August 29, 2008

Fall Movie Reviews

Bangkok Dangerous: Starring Nicolas Cage, Shahkrit Yamnarm.

It is our honest opinion that Nicolas Cage is washed up and should be downgraded to B movies. Bangkok Dangerous plot is likewise crap, in which he plays an assassin who falls in love, has a change of heart, yada yada yada, saves the girl, kills the bad guys and retires. Worse, the movie is a remake. Next!

Righteous Kill: Starring Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson, Donnie Wahlberg.

This movie is a serial thriller about two New York City cops with an all star cast. The two cops are chasing a vigilante serial killer who is hunting down criminals and killing them. Its basically the same plot as the Dirty Harry movie "Magnum Force", but with two stellar actors and different circumstances. Doesn't look bad judging by the trailer.

The Women: Starring Candice Bergen, Annette Bening, Bette Midler, Meg Ryan, Eva Mendes, Jada Pinkett Smith and Debra Messing.

This film is basically a remake of "The First Wives Club" and the 1939 George Cukor classic of the same name about infidelity, but evidently with a lot more women. Indeed, Bette Midler also starred in "The First Wives Club", and we LOVE Bette Midler. That girl has the golden touch when it comes to comedy. Fans of Sex in the City will also appreciate the humour of this film.

High School Musical 3: Senior Year: Starring Zac Efron, Vanessa Anne Hudgens.

When will they stop making this horrible freaking musicals? Please make it stop.

Burn After Reading: Starring Brad Pitt, George Clooney, John Malkovich.

Made by the same people who made "The Big Lebowski", with a stellar cast and a plot reminiscent of "Fun with Dick and Jane" this movie looks to be both funny and one that we would watch again and again and again... I suddenly have to watch "The Big Lebowski" again... which reminds me... rumour has it they're hoping to make a sequel: "The Little Lebowski".

Passchendaele: Paul Gross, Caroline Dhavernas, Gil Bellows.

Gross wrote, directed and stars in this drama about World War I. Blood, guts, war and romance? Sounds good, but lets hope it doesn't go to his head like what happened to Mel Gibson (who is now washed up and an anti-semite).

Appaloosa: Starring Ed Harris, Viggo Mortensen, Jeremy Irons and Renée Zellweger.

Westerns will never die, and this one just plain looks gooooood. The plot is similar to "A Fistful of Dollars" and numerous other westerns. Ed Harris and Viggo Mortensen worked well together in "A History of Violence", so this film could be just as good or better.

Beverly Hills Chihuahua: Starring the voices of Drew Barrymore, Cheech Marin and Salma Hayek.

We have a theory about dog movies and it goes like this: All dog movies are automatically instant hits because the dog lovers all go see them and drag their kids to go see them too. In other words this movie could be utter crap and it wouldn't matter because its just another dog movie.

Igor: Starring the voices of John Cusack, Sean Hayes, Christian Slater, Steve Buscemi, John Cleese and Molly Shannon.

Hunchbacked lab assistant Igor has big dreams of becoming a mad scientist himself and winning the annual Evil Science Fair. Touches of both the Nightmare Before Christmas and Shrek... possibly a winner for both kids and adults alike.

Ghost Town: Starring Ricky Gervais, Téa Leoni and Greg Kinnear.

Gervais takes on his first leading role as a jerk of a dentist who can suddenly see ghosts – and one of them (Kinnear) needs a favour breaking up his widow's impending marriage. Doesn't look that spectacular, but can't say for certain.

Rachel Getting Married: Starring Anne Hathaway, Rosemarie Dewitt, Debra Winger.

Dysfunctional drama queen Kym arrives back home post-rehab for her sister Rachel's wedding, trailing destruction in her wake. Funny? Possibly, if you like watching a train wreck of a wedding.

W: Starring Josh Brolin, James Cromwell, Richard Dreyfuss and Thandie Newton.

Oliver Stone's comic look at the young George W. Bush and his rise from drunken party boy to president. Worth a laugh.

Miracle at St. Anna: Starring Derek Luke, Michael Ealy, Laz Alonso.

Spike Lee directs his first war movie about four black American soldiers stationed in Italy during World War II who end up trapped behind enemy lines... the trailer is fantastic and we're looking forward to seeing this one.

Eagle Eye: Starring Shia LaBeouf, Michelle Monaghan and Billy Bob Thornton.

Two strangers get caught in a cyber cat-and-mouse game with a mystery woman who somehow knows their every move. If the plot reminds you of "The Net" or "Phone Booth", its because its just as lame.

The Lucky Ones (Maple): Rachel McAdams, Michael Peña and Tim Robbins.

Three injured soldiers returning from Iraq find life has moved on in their absence. This has potential to be really good... or really bad.

Blindness: Starring Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo, Danny Glover.

A city is ravaged by an epidemic of instant white blindness and as society breaks down, one woman whose sight is unaffected is the sole witness to the spectacle. This film is another one of those "you've gotta see this". Like Memento or Schindler's List its just one of those films you have to see someday.

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist: Starring Michael Cera and Kat Dennings.

Two strangers spend one crazy night of adventure in the heart of New York's music scene. Yawn.

Happy-Go-Lucky: Sally Hawkins, Eddie Marsan.

Sally Hawkins as an endlessly optimistic, free-spirited single teacher in London who won't even let the theft of her bike get her down. She signs up for driving lessons with uptight Scott (Marsan). Yawn.

The Secret Life of Bees: Starring Dakota Fanning, Jennifer Hudson, Queen Latifah.

A 14-year-old girl's distant memories of her late mother who finds herself in the solitary world of beekeeping. Yawn.

Pride and Glory: Starring Edward Norton, Colin Farrell and Jon Voight.

A family of New York City cops sees loyalties tested after the violent deaths of four officers on one of two brothers' squads. Three actors that we can't stand, a crappy plot and thus we don't recommend paying to see this.

Zack and Miri Make a P0rno: Starring Seth Rogan, Elizabeth Banks, Jason Mewes.

Zack and Miri decide making a p0rn flick will help them get out of debt, but it results in some mixed up feelings. Kevin Smith directs so its gotta be good... and hilarious. Lots of intellectual potty humour for those who appreciate it.

The Changeling: Starring Angelina Jolie and John Malkovich.

A Los Angeles mother's kidnapped son is returned, but she realizes this child is not hers and is some kind of doppleganger/alien and has to deal with corrupt police and a skeptical public. Sounds pretty good, a bit like the Bodysnatchers.

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